Last Friday I was at the church without my best training mate -- you know her as Alison -- and decided to go ahead with the full loop, and I decided, just for fun, to see how fast I could finish. So, I set the Timex and took off, full speed, me and the iPod with the brand spanking new running mix. (praise Jesus, amen.) It starts with (don't laugh) Mexican Radio, which is a surprisingly good song to run to, especially early in the morning when the core isn't quite motivated to do the things it needs to do. Before Cat Hill we get a little Tenderness. That's right, I like the 80's, and so do you even if you don't want to admit it. You're screaming for General Public right now, I know you are. Anyway, I'm trudging up Cat Hill when my BF Justin Timberlake and his SexyBack come on. I think the next songs are When You Were Young, We Used to be Friends, 1234 (slow, but sweet), Lovestoned (yep, more JT), Lose Control, Shut Up And Drive ... after that I can't remember because by then I was making my way up the incline that never, ever stops, and feeling frustrated because a lesser runner passed me. Now, I know it's not nice to talk bad about people in church, but this runner had really bad form, and I did not like what she was wearing at all. Yet, she and her unnaturally long stride were ahead of me. I attempted to pick up the pace, but that incline was getting the better of me, so I stopped focusing on Long Stride and started focusing on not walking. Once up the hill (hooray for the downhill) I decided to try to catch up with Long Stride again, but she was pretty far ahead. Finally, she caught the light at the 72nd Street transverse, and I caught her just as the light was turning, so I zoomed past (yep, I said "zoomed") and started hauling ass the last 12 block with a "Ha! Take that" attitude. But, my cockiness was stifled when Long Stride silently passed me. "How dare she", I thought, and started running even faster, but, for no apparent reason, I started feeling dizzy. A chill took over my body, and I started seeing spots. I thought I was going to faint, but I didn't stop running. Finally, at the bottom of the park, I gave up on catching Long Stride because, hey, my run was over. I glanced at my watch, fully expecting to see 57 minutes flashing back at me... but, no, the Timex said 52:53. I rubbed my eyes. That couldn't be right, could it? I ran 6 miles under 9 minute miles? Come on! Surely I'd made a mistake.
Well, I went back out on Saturday morning to see if I could do it again. I won't bore you with the details; let me just say that church is crazy crowded on the weekends. I decided to take the loop in the opposite direction, and I also paid more attention to the Timex. Long story short, I got back to the start and, wouldn't you know, 52:47! I am running faster! Timex says so! I felt great the rest of the weekend, even though I skipped the Queens Half Marathon in favor of sleeping in on Sunday. I did do a 13 mile run down to Battery Park and back, but I didn't keep time.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
Speed Demon
7:00a.m. (hit the alarm) Maybe I should sleep for another nine minutes.
7:09a.m. Get up, dummy, no one told you to drink two glasses of white wine last night. Justin Timberlake sure is hot.
7:20a.m. Drink water don't forget to drink water, and roll, make sure you roll out the IT bands, and please stretch, stop being so freakin' lazy, I wonder if it's true that Meredith wants to leave the Today show, she and Matt look like they're getting along so well.
7:40a.m. Oh, I am going to be so late for work, shit, iPod not charged, must get other iPod.
7:45a.m. Playlist, need to make new running play list, so sick of Nelly Furtado and Black Eyed Peas.
8:00a.m. When are my wine-heavy legs going to wake up? That girl is fast, maybe I can catch her.... Nope.
8:05a.m. Let's check out what people are wearing at church today. Hmm, I like that tank, doesn't look like a Nike though, I don't like that guy's socks, why don't guys know they should wear short socks instead of scrunching the big ones down, come on it's 2007 the 80's are over, hey, cool group of very professional-looking foreign runners coming right at me, wow, they are cool, very lean, and very fast. I'll run faster. Ugh, legs still not ready. Stupid wine.
8:20a.m. Should I run the big loop? Six miles I need today. Big loop or time, big loop or time? Why is this a debate? What's the point? Is running 30 minutes up and back psychologically less daunting? I've run this loop a billion times, why am I angsting about it now? I know all about the tricky incline that goes for days, I know that after the incline is a satisfying downhill that takes you right into another hill, and I know when I pass 72nd Street the end is going to feel too far away even though it's only twelve blocks down with a water fountain in between. So, why the debate? Just do the full loop, dammit, and be done you silly silly woman. Stop being scared / lazy / whatever and do it!
8:25a.m. "... tail dropper show stopper do my thing mutha fucka..." If you can sing you're not running fast enough.
8:28a.m. I wonder why that guy smiled as he passed, maybe I was taking up too much space probably all over the place, he's fast, but not too fast, I think I can do that pace, little Asian dude in the red I am going to follow you... oh, no, don't go on the bridal path...
8:30a.m. He's back! Asian guy is back! And I am running with him! I am fast, faster than everyone in this park, me and Asian dude. Look, there's a stop light! Not anymore, I just took it, it is a thing of my running past, hey and I am going to pass this girl who is having entirely too much fun swinging her arms around, ha, I will pass her, oh no, Asian dude where are you going? Don't turn left on 72nd, stay with me!
8:33a.m. I can go fast on my own, I can. I slowed down, but now I'm back, and "coming out of my cage and I've been doin' just fine gotta gotta be down because I want it all it started out with a kiss how did it end up like this it was only a kiss it was only a kiss now theyre falling asleep and she's calling a cab while he's having a smoke and she's taking a drag and it's all in my head and my stomache is sick..."
8:38a.m. And the finish is up ahead thank you Killers you've helped me run fast as did the Asian dude, I see the end and I am speeding to it faster and faster... oh, man, why stop light do you tackle me now when I was so close to crossing?
8:43a.m. The green awning, I am going to be so late for work. Lady passing me looks miffed is it at me? Hey, lady, I just ran six miles before 9:00a.m. What have you done today?
7:09a.m. Get up, dummy, no one told you to drink two glasses of white wine last night. Justin Timberlake sure is hot.
7:20a.m. Drink water don't forget to drink water, and roll, make sure you roll out the IT bands, and please stretch, stop being so freakin' lazy, I wonder if it's true that Meredith wants to leave the Today show, she and Matt look like they're getting along so well.
7:40a.m. Oh, I am going to be so late for work, shit, iPod not charged, must get other iPod.
7:45a.m. Playlist, need to make new running play list, so sick of Nelly Furtado and Black Eyed Peas.
8:00a.m. When are my wine-heavy legs going to wake up? That girl is fast, maybe I can catch her.... Nope.
8:05a.m. Let's check out what people are wearing at church today. Hmm, I like that tank, doesn't look like a Nike though, I don't like that guy's socks, why don't guys know they should wear short socks instead of scrunching the big ones down, come on it's 2007 the 80's are over, hey, cool group of very professional-looking foreign runners coming right at me, wow, they are cool, very lean, and very fast. I'll run faster. Ugh, legs still not ready. Stupid wine.
8:20a.m. Should I run the big loop? Six miles I need today. Big loop or time, big loop or time? Why is this a debate? What's the point? Is running 30 minutes up and back psychologically less daunting? I've run this loop a billion times, why am I angsting about it now? I know all about the tricky incline that goes for days, I know that after the incline is a satisfying downhill that takes you right into another hill, and I know when I pass 72nd Street the end is going to feel too far away even though it's only twelve blocks down with a water fountain in between. So, why the debate? Just do the full loop, dammit, and be done you silly silly woman. Stop being scared / lazy / whatever and do it!
8:25a.m. "... tail dropper show stopper do my thing mutha fucka..." If you can sing you're not running fast enough.
8:28a.m. I wonder why that guy smiled as he passed, maybe I was taking up too much space probably all over the place, he's fast, but not too fast, I think I can do that pace, little Asian dude in the red I am going to follow you... oh, no, don't go on the bridal path...
8:30a.m. He's back! Asian guy is back! And I am running with him! I am fast, faster than everyone in this park, me and Asian dude. Look, there's a stop light! Not anymore, I just took it, it is a thing of my running past, hey and I am going to pass this girl who is having entirely too much fun swinging her arms around, ha, I will pass her, oh no, Asian dude where are you going? Don't turn left on 72nd, stay with me!
8:33a.m. I can go fast on my own, I can. I slowed down, but now I'm back, and "coming out of my cage and I've been doin' just fine gotta gotta be down because I want it all it started out with a kiss how did it end up like this it was only a kiss it was only a kiss now theyre falling asleep and she's calling a cab while he's having a smoke and she's taking a drag and it's all in my head and my stomache is sick..."
8:38a.m. And the finish is up ahead thank you Killers you've helped me run fast as did the Asian dude, I see the end and I am speeding to it faster and faster... oh, man, why stop light do you tackle me now when I was so close to crossing?
8:43a.m. The green awning, I am going to be so late for work. Lady passing me looks miffed is it at me? Hey, lady, I just ran six miles before 9:00a.m. What have you done today?
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